People sometimes ask why I built **anothercon.com**.
The answer is simple. Maybe play the recording below, because by this time I was pretty ill. 48 hours later I was in hospital having a full on argument with a doctor suggesting I should not be standing and must have taken something (like illegal). I told him I don't even drink.
Everything now was sorted out because now I had an audience! and they did jump.
I had to do the above and create childadvocacy.info to have the social workers and my sons school take a blind bit of notice of me. Quote from my sons shrink I employed, "They have got the wrong idea and run with it." We never saw the social worker again. 3 days later we received a letter, they had closed their case. A week later CAMHS had closed their case too. I maintain this is simply because I had a audience.
Why this hurt me so much!
As a child, I was sent to Berrow Wood School. It was an institution, a boarding school. I experienced sexual, emotional and physical abuse there. until I ran away missing all my childhood examinations.
My mother knew something was seriously wrong. She wrote three letters of complaint and made repeated phone calls to the authorities. They passed responsibility from one department to another, did nothing meaningful, and even threatened her with legal action if I was not returned. I was a small 15 year old child, how could I possibly explain a man I thought was ax ex. SAS soldier tried to do the unthinkable to me? And the authorities, they had something better to do.
Nearly thirty years later, more than half of the staff from Berrow Wood were eventually jailed, now including the man who attempted to anal rape me on more than 1 occasion. (I don't know if another inmate got hold of him but he died in jail 2 years later.) The school had been closed down years earlier and the authorities buried everything! until this reporter Maisy Olar posted a message on a newsgroup set up for prior puples of the school. You see sometimes to be heard you often need an audience and the BBC is a big audience.
That experience shaped the rest of my life. I promised myself that if I ever had children, I would protect them from anything remotely similar. Honestly it was by the time I had children the sole purpose of life.
So when my son started secondary school, I thought I had done everything right. I spent over £50,000 moving house so my children could attend what I believed was the best school possible. A lot of money in 2006
Instead, history started repeating itself. First is was the dismissive staff at George Abbot School in Guildford who forced social workers on the family rather than making a simple phonecall I requested
Within weeks, I felt the school was looking for any reason to call in the social workers. 2 found nothing wrong. Then why my son shouldn't be there in their school rather than trying to understand and help him. "We think this might not be the correct school for your child." Lets not forget he has an education statement so they were being paid a lot more money and they would not even set him homework. "Children in the lower sets don't get homework." End of conversation, nothing about the special needs education plans for special needs students. And I was expected to keep my cool and not fly off the handle. All I ever asked was that someone picked up the phone and spoke to his Scout leader—someone who knew him well. A five-minute conversation. "No, somebody else will do that.", "No someboebody in the office will do that." and on it went...
I asked once.
Twice.
Three times.
Four times.
Five times.
2 months later and still nobody would make the call.
Instead, I was told to speak to a 3rd social worker because there had supposedly been an abuse allegation. To this day I beleive it was all a scam to encourage me to remove him from the school. I was then told CAMHS were discussing whether my son should be taken into care despite not having met him.
Still nobody would make the phone call.
I lost my wife, as she ran off with a text message and the first person who would take her. Well I was pretty ill by this time.
Eventually I suffered a full on nervous breakdown.
To this day, I genuinely believe the school was looking for any reason to get rid of my son until I created an audience that meant people outside the system were watching. Whether others agree or not, that is how it felt to me, and nothing I have seen since has changed that view.
What struck me most was how closely this mirrored my mother's experience all those years earlier. She was one woman trying to make the authorities listen. Her letters were ignored, her phone calls were passed from one department to another, only she had no way of creating an audience back in 1985 when childline 08001111 did not even exist. There was no internet, no social media and no website like this one. She had no voice.
I realised I was in exactly the same position—except I did have a way of creating an audience, I had a kiddy shrink in the family, I got on well with the prior school head. And i had loads of what you might call 'James Bond' gadgets.
The problem wasn't that nobody could hear me.
The problem was that nobody in George Abbot School had to.
So I did the only thing left and started using some of my gadgets to generate proof.
Then I created an audience, and I went for broke! My kids were the most important people in my life and I was not going to let the system do to them what it did to me while I could still draw breath.
Once there was an audience did professionals begin taking me seriously. Only then did I obtain the documents and admissions that should never have required a public audience in the first place. At one stage, after I presented evidence to my son's previous headteacher and an independent child psychologist I had employed, the response became:
"Oh, we never made an abuse allegation. Not us." In a roundabout way the school blamed the social workers and the social workers told a pack of lies. It did not do me any good but did I see red and then I thought up this site and how it might help others
Well that is why **ChildAdvocac.info** exists.
Not because I enjoy conflict. Play the recording above, I tried to walk away from conflict at every turn. Then when I was told people who had not even met my son or me were suggesting he be placed in care and twigged the wifes affair I saw RED!
Not because I wanted to spend years documenting this.
But because I discovered something that should concern every parent.
If you are just one parent raising concerns, or asking for help with your child you can be ignored, brushed aside, dismissed, especally if your child is only 1 in 2000 in a school looking for an easy life.
If thousands of people are watching, and they know you have been making covert recordings, suddenly you are heard.
My mother never had that opportunity. She was of a generation that was fooled the system was there to serve the public, that it did not lie and that it knew best. I knew better! The systems first concern is the system and silencing decent. Its that simple and until you are at odds with it few understand even if you have proof the system can simply ignore you and it will until it percerves a threat it can't ignore or silence.
That is why this website exists.
You only have to spend ten minutes on **ChildAdvocac.info** to understand why I felt I had no choice but to create that audience and that threat. Everybody closed their case in like 2 weeks CAMS and the social workers. Only I was left a single father with a full time job on my own bringing up 2 very hurt children. Then I wasted so much of my time chasing an apology. The system simply does not apologise and thats a very hard lesson to learn. You can prove what you like and the system could not care a hoot unless you can damage its reputation.
If you want to understand the full story, you can also read my book, **Life After Child Abuse** by Darren Warnett, which is available on the childadvocacy.info site.
If, like me, you ever find yourself in a position where you need an audience—or even just the threat of one—to ensure your concerns are taken seriously, you can create your own page at **AnotherCon.com/your-title**.
Your situation may have nothing to do with child protection or schools. It may have nothing to do with the authorities at all.
Perhaps it's a garage that charged you for parts that were never fitted. A builder who took your money and disappeared. An insurance company refusing to deal with a legitimate claim. A council, business or public body that simply won't listen. Or perhaps it's simply someone in a position of power who believes they can ignore you because your little and they think nobody else is watching.
Whatever the issue, there are times when one person can feel completely powerless. Well I'm not suggesting this site will give you any power but an advert like https://www.anothercon.com/your-title might get you heard, especally if sent to the chief exectutive of a company for example.
AnotherCon gives you somewhere to document your evidence, tell your story and, if necessary, create an audience.
You don't need permission to tell your story.
You don't need anyone else's approval to preserve evidence.
Sometimes the knowledge that your story, documents and recordings could become public is enough to make people listen.
Not because you've threatened anyone. Just ask them maybe in writing if they have ever seen this site, you never know, that might be enough.
Because accountability begins the moment people realise someone else may be watching and they might be held accountable for their actions.